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Jakob, 32

Offline, last seen Tue, 10 Mar 2026 17:54:48

About Me

If you REALLY wanna know hit me up, I tend to ramble on if I'm having to think about my likes and dislikes. I figure you're either going to message me or not based on appearance anyway. APPARENTLY I get 3 times as many messages if this is longer, but even if I choose not to, it still makes me type in this box. Dubbya Tee Eff.And as a disclaimer, the rest of the profile is going to be random thoughts, observations or humor that I've updated at various times."I love Shakespeare. And I know that it may not be practical, but if it wasn't for him, I would have totally over-reacted when my girlfriend killed herself. That joke may not be for everyone, and I understand that. But you should probably read more." -Jeselnik.Brrring! Brrrring! Hello Cheese? No - Cheese can't dial a phone!Is it just me or does it seem silly to have "; in your headline? Wouldn't it then be called "Plenty of Mammals"?OH, and if you can pull off an English accent the rest of your life, You're Hired.Reoccurring theme in my love life - If it's not broke, give me 5 minutes."I don't have a lot of time" - errrr "Here's B.O.B, date that for a while"One of the differences between comedy and perversity is inflection.You might know what I'm talking about, but do you truly understand?I know America is an obese country now, but we really need to re-examine the term "Average Body Type"Does anyone else think it's a shame that MCA died, yet many shitty pop stars are still alive and living fat?This thing keeps getting longer and longer - *UPDATE* It was brought to my attention that I have non-smoker on the profile, yet a cigarette in the display pic. I quit, yay. Anyway, no back story to that, just an explanation.Ha, I got blocked by someone for helping them out with their choice in photos.. ****ed up.Aaaaaaaand if you have kids, we know they're your life. I would assume that unless you decided to put, "I have a kid and he/she is a pain in my ass and I neglect him/her at every turn" I ALMOST want to list the ironic sh*t I read in profiles, but I think that might bore others that aren't as drunk and don't find it as humorous as I do.If I had a sex change, I would work in a strip club and promote the hell out of it on here! That's a great way to lure people in and get them to pay me. I'd like to mix things up, so this would really depend on what's going on that week. Drinks and conversation are always a good starter for me.

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Other

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    5'9"

  • Eye color

    Blue

  • Smoke

    No

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

SIMILAR PEOPLE

Great
stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
  • Sparky

    Online

    Man. 74 years old. Zodiac sign: Capricorn.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 56-76

    Hi! My name is Sparky. I am divorced other caucasian man with kids from Kunkletown, Pennsylvania, United States. Now I'm looking for new relationships. I want to meet a woman, love of my life.

  • Pizon

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    Man. 55 years old. Zodiac sign: Pisces.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 37-57

    Hi! My name is Pizon. I am separated other caucasian man with kids from Kunkletown, Pennsylvania, United States. Now I'm looking for new relationships. I want to meet a woman, love of my life.

  • Gianni

    Offline

    Man. 33 years old. Zodiac sign: Gemini.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 30-40

    I am a very easy going and down to earth guy. I have lived all over the country and am well traveled. I am looking to meet new people for friendship, maybe more. I enjoy painting and doing my art, but even more I enjoy other people's art, that is why I surround my self with friends that are artists and musicians. I like all types of music for oldies to dubstep and everything in between. Cooking is another interest of mine. I find reward in cooking new foods for friends and family. My ideal night in, starts and ends with "good food and good company".My friends are like my family and I have my best "guy" friend. I am looking for that in a girlfriend, a real connection. One night stands and people looking to just hook up, move all to another profile, that's not what I'm about. I am looking for a women who is funny, down to earth, and enjoy the little things in life. Fair warning: I do not do well with high maintenance, demanding or princess types. Women should be respected and treated well, but I will not break my back to kiss your ass. I am no doormat and don't want one. Some baggage is ok, every body has some, but there is diffidently a line. I am ***friendly, but I do not do hard drugs. Addiction is beyond the line for me. I have hand several long term relationships and know what I want. First dates should be simple and fun. First dates are all about getting to know the other person. How do you get to know someone at a loud bar or a movie? Going to an art galley, dinner, a walk or some other fun outdoor activity, are things I like do on a first date. Open to ideas.

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