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Elisha, 34
United States, Georgia, Sandy Springs

Offline, last seen Sat, 25 Oct 2025 10:14:18

About Me

(Author's Note: I know that with these internet profiles, you're suppose to put your best foot forward in your vain attempt to attract more attention then everybody else. However, I learned a long time ago that isn't always the best thing to do. So what I've decided to do is put my WORST foot forward since if you can't survive my profile, then there's no way you're going to be able to survive me! Humor is a huge part of my life so if you don't find what's below humorous, then we'll probably never get along.)I consider myself to be an honest man. In fact, anyone that has ever known me has considered me to be not just honest, but brutally honest; meaning that even when I SHOULD lie, I don't. So in light of this wonderful quality that I have so mastered, I have decided to make this section a complete no-holds-barred truth session about me. I once told my Mother that I thought there should be a reality show about me. Her response to that was simply "I don't think the world is quite reeady for you." Touché Mother... Touché. I am the director for Odyssey Paranormal Society. If you have any questions or stories for me, I'd be happy to hear/answer them! Check us out on ***/OdysseyParanormalSociety. Looking for new members if you know of anyone!I once accidentally wore a Santa suit to a funeral I wasn't invited to. True story!An anagram for my name is "Manche Oil Lie". I don't know what that is, but it sounds awesome! Friends comes and go, but styrofoam; now THAT lasts forever! What? Didn't think a guy could think of something that deep? I'm a variable kiddie pool of deep thinking!Even though I’m a Packers fan come football season, the Twins have always been my team when it comes to Baseball. I remember spending the night at my Grandma’s and listening on the radio the night Puckett hit the game winning home run during the ’87 World Series. I jumped out of bed and ran to the livingroom to watch the replay on TV. I don’t think I’d ever run so fast in my life and still haven’t! But, I’m smarter now than I was back then, so if I were to race against my former self, I would simply stick my foot out and trip me! I’d never see it coming! I really like to fight. Not "Fight Club" style fighting (although if it was I couldn't talk about it) but just having stupid debates about the most assinine topics. A lot of the time, I'll pick sides that don't even come close to what I actually believe just so I can debate someone about it. So, you'd better bring your A+ game!I love golf! Why? The shorter answer is: What do I NOT like about Golf? I don't like trees and the fact that I keep going in them. I don't like slow players because then I have to wait for the area to clear before I can hit my ball out of the trees. I don't like rain and how it makes me and the long grass wet which increases the difficulty of my hitting my ball out of the trees once the slow people have cleared the area. LOVE everything else!Think I’m a great catch yet? Well you should! I'm a hopeless romantic and I can't help but be so. I send flowers for no reason, write poetry, and plan lavish dinners just because it's fun. I have no idea how I manage to still be straight... Oh well. I think I'm pretty smart, and I'm about as creative as a person can get. I know looking over that list of wonderful adjectives that I just seem too good to be true. Well, you’re right. Whereas those are all true, I'm also exceptionally sarcastic and crude. To sum up: I'm pretty awesome!What the problem here is, you women don't want just a nice guy. You want a nice guy who is HOT. And why wouldn't you? Why wouldn't you settle for a good looking man with the personality of a grapefruit and an ego the size of Texas? Sure, he may be able to make his man-boobs do the Marcarena and I can only make mine do the hopscotch, but I'll make you far happier than he ever will, and that's a guarantee. I draw a mean stick figure. Seriously, it's phenomenal. You'd take one look at it and go "Oh. My. God. I've never seen anything like that!" I'd just say, "I know." Then we'd make sweet, sweet love. Oh yeah... they're that good.There's two kinds of people that I hate. The people who use the phrase "Life is too short..." (because, come on, what can you possibly do that's LONGER???) And the people who write a description of themselves right next to their picture! (Are you kidding me!? I can SEE you know! Do I really need to READ it? Do you not think that I'll be able to tell from your PICTURE what you look like? I may be a guy, but I'm not THAT stupid!)It just makes me want to club a baby seal. Seriously, if there was one next to me, I would grab a club and just go to town on the thing! I hate it that much! Oh, and shorthand. Can't STAND shorthand! It's like I'm talking to a retarded gorilla. And I said retarded gorilla because I'm sure a non-retarded one could type in a more understandable way. This is just a warning, but don’t ask me stupid questions like: “What are you thinking about?â€

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Yes

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Atheist

  • Body type

    Curvy

  • Height

    6'0"

  • Eye color

    Blue

  • Smoke

    No

  • Drink

    No

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  • Kenton from Sandy Springs | Man | 47 years old | Libra
    Kenton

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    Man. 47 years old. Zodiac sign: Libra.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 37-57

    I'm a clean cut nice guy with a good career, a home of my own and a great sense of humor. I'm great with kids and I might like to have a family someday but I'm also realistic and realize that at this point in my life it might not be in the cards for me. It all depends on who I meet. My life is outstanding! I'm just missing the right woman to share it all with. I'm a fine wine salesman and I play the saxophone on the side for fun. I like good food, wine and music. I love to travel and I enjoy listening to audio books while I'm driving my car. I spend most of my time taking care of my house, shopping and cooking. I try to eat a healthy diet but I'll cheat on my diet every now and then so I can enjoy something tasty! I like exploring new places and finding little out of the way restaurants. I'm looking for a woman with a good head on her shoulders and a great sense of humor. I believe in mutual attraction, chemistry and most of all I believe in trusting your *** that an initial meeting should consist of a cup of coffee in a quiet cafe where the two of us can talk and get to know each other better. If there's some chemistry and we like each other then the second date can be anything from going for a walk to dinner and a show.

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  • Ron from Sandy Springs | Man | 44 years old | Capricorn
    Ron

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    Man. 44 years old. Zodiac sign: Capricorn.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 34-54

    this is a little insight on men.1. The nice men are ugly.2. The handsome men are not nice.3. The handsome and nice men are gay.4. The handsome, nice and heterosexual men aremarried.5. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men,have no money.6. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice menwith money think women are only after their money7. The handsome men without money are after thewomen's money.8. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhatheterosexual, don't think women are beautiful enough.9. The men who think women are beautiful, that areheterosexual, somewhat nice and have money, are cowards.10.The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhatnice and have some money and thank God are heterosexual, are shy andNEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!11.The men who never make the first move,automatically lose interest in women when the women take the initiativeNOW ... who the hell do you your think i am?“But sexy doesn't impress me. Smart impresses me, strength of character impresses me. But most of all, I am impressed by kindness. Kindness, I think, comes from learning hard lessons well, from falling and picking yourself up. It comes from surviving failure and loss. It implies an understanding of the human condition, forgives its many flaws and quirks. When I see that in someone, it fills me with admiration.â€

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  • Ryan from Sandy Springs | Man | 34 years old | Libra
    Ryan

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    Man. 34 years old. Zodiac sign: Libra.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 18-35

    Hi! My name is Ryan. I am never married other caucasian man without kids from Sandy Springs, Georgia, United States. Now I'm looking for new relationships. I want to meet a woman, love of my life.

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