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Oswaldo, 33
United States, New Jersey, Franklinville

Online

About Me

SWM in non-existant job seeks hostile woman for tepid sex, hustling, and mutual psychological torture. I enjoy drinking, smoking, pornography, and self-righteous indignation. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure. I can't stand movies, and the last album I bought was The Elvis Presley Revival Band's Greatest Hits. Way down deep, I'm very shallow. I have middling intelligence but try to appear smarter by affecting a world-weary air, memorizing pointless quotes of classical works, and chuckling at my own mean-spirited, agenda-driven jokes. I'm 31, but look 58 and feel 65. I'm looking for a fun evening that doesn't end in a puddle of vomit or at the emergency room. I am looking for a good time and a few laughs that have nothing to do with your nude photos. I'm not holding my breath, but I am looking for interesting conversation with someone that will not have to be quoted later on in a courtroom.YOU: You are a man-hating, bitter shrew with a misplaced sense of entitlement and unrealistic expectations. In time you will become coolly hostile when I don't fulfill every unmet need you've ever had. You feel very strongly about woman's rights and equality when it suits your purpose. You filled your profile with generalities, and yet you expect guys to guess what you are interested in when writing to you. Extra credit if you just finished dating every guy in town but now want to take your time with me. For our first date we should head over to Wal- You wouldn't have to get all dressed up an stuff, I could find out what your favorite color was and you could find out if I blush when we walk through the lingerie section. I would be open to an unsatisfying fling that leaves me filled with regret and dread but prefer a long-term, soul crushing descent into booze and pills. Age unimportant, but I will condescend to women under 20 and rehash mother issues with women over 49, serious replies please…P.S. This hopefully made you laugh because it is fictitious. I think a good first meet up would be for coffee and figure out if we click. I'm old school and a first date needs to be asked in person.

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    5'7"

  • Eye color

    Green

  • Smoke

    No

  • Drink

    No

INTERESTS

Rap Playing Cards Caribbean Mexican Ice Hockey Play Sport Games
Wink Icon color PERSONAL INFORMATION Fave
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SIMILAR PEOPLE

Great
stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
  • Esteban from Franklinville | Man | 34 years old | Scorpio
    Esteban

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    Man. 34 years old. Zodiac sign: Scorpio.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 31-41

    Hobbies, musical and artistic taste, my job? I know a lot of ***holes who are into exactly what I am; so I have a hard time thinking that the sum of my interests defines me. I'm a firm believer that we are what we have learned from our experiences. Worst case scenario, we learn the wrong lessons and become jaded. Best case scenario, we learn from our misfortune and smile through chipped teeth with more confidence than we had before. I am a man who values a sense of humor, a strong will and a girl who can hold her liquor, (Let's be honest, I sell beer). Most of all, I like people who don't take themselves too seriously. I want to travel, build motorcycles and enjoy my life with someone who understands what it is to have a deeper passion for life. Anything specific I put here will sound forced and cliche'. Sufficed to say, it has to be spontaneous, different and require a little homework.

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  • Jophiel from Franklinville | Man | 33 years old | Taurus
    Jophiel

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    Man. 33 years old. Zodiac sign: Taurus.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 30-40

    I enjoy good conversation with a few laughs, reading. I have a good sense of humor. I want what no one admits they want - having someone accept you for you, being me from day one to the last day.

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  • Benjamin from Franklinville | Man | 32 years old | Taurus
    Benjamin

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    Man. 32 years old. Zodiac sign: Taurus.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 29-39

    My friends would say I am a good hearted person that enjoys making people laugh. Some things I enjoy are,TravelingCampingBBQs with friendsPokerUFCCollege football Go DUCKS!!!!

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