Total users: 63,173,072 Online users: 227,585
Winona, 32
United States, Kansas, Arkansas City

Offline, last seen Sun, 07 Jun 2026 13:38:19

About Me

I make mistakes, I'm not perfect, I'm out of control, sometimes a lil crazy, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.As with material possessions or professional achievements, relationships give our ego a method by which to identify who we are to the outside world. The problem is that we attach so much of our identity to the external appearance of our relationships that we lose touch with the parts of ourselves that are wise and conscious. The attachment to this false identity leads to a feeling of desperation rather than fulfillment. After all, without the relationship, or the job, or whichever other false identity we have chosen, who would we be? Besides the ego identification, it's easy to develop a dependency on companionship. That independent person that we once were starts to evaporate. Our mind becomes fogged and as our self-identification begins to attach itself to the other person, unconsciously or consciously, we become afraid to lose that person. We become dependent on that person and fearful of loneliness. Out of our emotional insecurities, we start to become needy and to seek out validation from our partner. So, *** focusing on the celebration of love and partnership, it becomes a game of how to protect ourselves from loss. Out of a desire to avoid appearing needy and out of a fear of losing our partner, we start to filter what we say. In doing so, we do not communicate our needs clearly, openly or bravely. We somehow become convinced that our partner will magically know what to do to fulfill our needs. When our needs are not met, we secretly blame the other person and begin to resent them. When we are unhappy, our partner will pick up on the clues, and in turn, secretly resent us, thus starting a vicious cycle in the silent destruction of a romantic partnership. So much of what needed to be said was not said, and bad feelings are bottled up and start to accumulate for both parties. Have you ever had a friend come to you and complain about all of the things they are unhappy about with their partner? Those are the kinds of things they should be telling their partner, if they actually want a change. Worse yet is when one partner openly communicates their needs only to find that the other party is simply not listening, or does not fully acknowledge what was said, or makes them feel guilty for having those needs. Deep down, we are all really good people. But this doesn't mean that any combination of two good people will make a good partnership. There is such thing as a bad fit, and it is okay to admit it. The best fits are ones where the most important values for both people are met. They must have life goals that align with one another and have a mutual attraction, understanding, and level of respect for each other. Both people must be committed to making the partnership their top priority. Sometimes, even when we realize that our relationship isn't a good fit, we justify staying in it with what seem like logical reasons. We may feel that we won't find another person who accepts and loves us as much as the current partner. Or we may be afraid to be alone, so we simply settle by default. Each time we are reminded of the bad fit, we brush it under the rug and distract ourselves with some other thought. We may feel that we are doing a service to the other person by staying in the relationship, but in reality, we are hurting them by not being honest with them and ourselves. And we are accumulating bad feelings and bad energy in our inner space. The problem comes when we find ourselves in a relationship and we are constantly comparing our partners with this conjured-up "perfect" person. When that happens, we stop appreciating our partner for all the beautiful qualities they do possess. The truth is this perfect person does not exist. More importantly, we may not actually need all of these qualities in a partner to be extraordinarily happy. What we need is to identify the most important qualities that we must have in order to feel satisfied and fulfilled . By not having identified the must-have qualities in our chosen life partner, we end up settling, and since the person cannot give us the things we truly need, we start to resent them. This will snowball into larger issues. In life, we will get random results if we have not specified what we want. Identifying and understanding what it is that we need in a relationship, allows us to set clear intentions, and in doing so, moves us closer to realizing our intended desires. I'm up for anything fun.........

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    man

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Athletic

  • Height

    5'7"

  • Eye color

    Brown

  • Smoke

    Yes, socially

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

Action Biography Documentary Soccer / Football
Wink Icon color PERSONAL INFORMATION Fave
Chat

SIMILAR PEOPLE

Great
stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
  • Marietta from Arkansas City | Woman | 35 years old | Aquarius
    Marietta

    Offline

    Woman. 35 years old. Zodiac sign: Aquarius.

    Looking for: man. In age: 32-42

    Single mom of 2 fantastic kids, ages 8 and 4. i I like to spend time with my children, family and friends. I try to get to the gym a few times a week time permitting. I usually stay pretty active one way or another...hard not to with little ones running the house:) I am not saint but i am a Christian that goes to church as often as I can, again schedule permitting. I am looking for a Christian man, someone funny, smart, confident but not****, outgoing, educated, ambitious, financially and mentally stable..likes kids...and dogs (I have 2)... Seems like a tall order but I think he is out there somewhere:) **not interested in a hook-up, booty call or "friends with benefits" *** I'm not attracted to African American men. Thank you.***: please be like 32 or older, I usually don't date men much younger than I think it just depends on the person your with... I would be up for lots of different things...Except for maybe skydiving;)

    Chat
  • Thuy from Arkansas City | Woman | 27 years old | Scorpio
    Thuy

    Offline

    Woman. 27 years old. Zodiac sign: Scorpio.

    Looking for: man. In age: 24-34

    I am looking for someone who is willing to put in an equal effort. I love to go out and be an active dater and I am not looking for a booty call. I'm a thick woman, better be attracted to that sort of thing. No surprises here! Something that sets me apart from other people is that I have self confidence. I don't crave attention but I'm not afraid of it either. I am more attracted to chocolate fellas but lately my relationship record with them hasn't gone so well, so who knows? Try me. I'm not your average white girl. I have rhythm...shocking isn't it. That being said I love to go out and dance. I'm attracted to people who have a great sense of humor. I love to laugh and be silly! Pet peeves: punctuality, please have it. Texting, communication is a two way street. If you don't text or call me back in a timely matter I will assume you don't care, therefore why should I? Flakey people. You flake, you're done.I make time for people who make time for me. Period.Please don't ask me questions that I have already answered on my profile, since you're here I assume you can read. Don't ask me why I'm on meetville, I'm single. That's why. I do not deal with bullshit. Pardon if I am blunt but I am sick of the men that have fed me crap. They can't all be ***holes right?? Here's hoping there is some one out there who can prove me right. Fingers crossed!! Something other than a movie and dinner. Can't get to know someone by sitting in the dark not talking....that comes later lol Lets try something fun!

    Chat
  • Shaylyn from Arkansas City | Woman | 31 years old | Aquarius
    Shaylyn

    Offline

    Woman. 31 years old. Zodiac sign: Aquarius.

    Looking for: man. In age: 28-38

    I'm a smart cookie that loves art, music, architecture, travel and adventure. I just finished my graduate certificate in Integrated Communications Marketing and I'm pursuing an MS Marketing. I'm a contemporary bible-based christian and seem to fit in just about anywhere. My church feels like my second home; its a contemporary setting and fairly non-traditional; a perfect fit for me. Love music and I've been told I can sing bit but I'm more of a drive-time karaoke super-star than a performer. Mostly I listen to contemporary christian in various forms and some radio-edited regular stuff.I am happiest in small groups of friends where conversations are all over the map. I'm not a morning person nor girly girl nor anywhere near high maintenance. I love to stay active but I'm not the athletic type... but have aspirations to be (don't we all). I played softball as a kid and can still catch well enough to protect my face from flying projectiles. Sorry, zero interest in football.If, after you read this, you think I sound like a good match, write me and lets get to know each other. How about flat water kayaking and a picnic lunch? Mini-golfing and batting cages? A trip through a museum followed by pizza on a swing set?Doesn't really matter what we do so long as we talk and get to know each other. After that we could go for more adventurous things like ziplining, go-carts, zorbing, hot-air ballooning, full harness bungee... I admit I have a list of adventure and I am looking for a special someone to share the experiences with but if it isn't your speed you can take the pictures ;)

    Chat
See more
Follow Us: