SIMILAR PEOPLE
on 377 reviews
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ElmerOnline
Man. 53 years old. Zodiac sign: Sagittarius.
Looking for: woman. In age: 43-63
Born and raised in the wild by a family of Red Squirrels, a sworn enemy of Gwen the Gwey. My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, (aka Derek Russo Sugli Alberi - Derek the Red Tree Dweller) commander of the Squirrel Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the TRUE emperor, Marcus Squirellius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next, so watch your nuts Gwen! N/S only please...I've seen this on a few profiles but have no idea what it means. I can only guess that it means "Non-slappers" or "no scroungers", so that'll do for me, or could it be Non-smokers, that's quite preferable too.Time to freshen this up a bitDue to recent popular demand and also as a reward to my fans around the world, I have decided to update my profile. After all its only fair to spread the joy, plus it makes me feel good too.....and that's all that counts really ;)Please feel free to contact me, I will try to reply, however if I don't, it could mean that, I don't think that we're suited, or, Ive forgotten how to type, or Ive had too much medication and passed out. Similarly, if I do reply, that doesn't mean that I think we're a good match. I just might be feeling chatty, obnoxious, witty, drunk or all eight. It's not like I haven't given you enough material to work with, so please say something more interesting than "Hi, how are you?"By day i work as a lab technician and due to a recent industrial accident have been blessed with the super power of flexibility and springiness, which I abuse to its full extent as a cat burglar and am now known by Interpol as Colin.This new found attribute has enabled me to start a diamond smuggling operation to finance my addiction to wine gums (which I am slowly conquering). I am considering selling my yacht and going into the shoe, flower and chocolate business. I’m an ex F1 driver and in my spare time I model hessian underwear.I can also blow up balloons and look good in big floppy shoes, red nose and curly wig....oh and I forgot to mention I’m also unbeaten at pooh sticks.Update (they seem to be a la mode so why not!)Unless you have gold and diamonds dripping from your ears and fingers or juicy gems sat on your chest i may not reply. (see profession)I'm ultimately looking for someone that can multitask, that way i can sit around all day and do sod all.Please show this on your profile if you know someone who has been eaten by a shark!~~~/~~~o/~~~Now wheres that nurse with the medication trolley........ Update 14.73 It would appear that its not just men that don't bother to read profiles, I'm still getting "hi there" and "hi how are you" messages.....so pique my interest, say more than hi, catch my eye and you may just get a reply ....oh i enjoyed that.Update 21.6.938.06.a Alas time and medication have now caught up with me and I no longer have dark flowing locks of hair, in fact its decidedly grey! As was once said by a famous Mexican "joo wanna stroaka ma goat?"Pooh Sticks of course
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MilesOnline
Man. 51 years old. Zodiac sign: Pisces.
Looking for: woman. In age: 41-61
Hi All ! LET ME START BY SAYING I DO NOT DRIVE!!!!!!! PHOBIA!!!! HATE IT!!!! I am a single father of a 14 year old girl, who I have raised completely by myself since she was 1, most of my family have passed.We moved to the area in ***, stayed for 5 and a half years, moved away for 2 and have just returned for good.I am a professional musician and have had an amazing career (that's right ***years of paying gigs) and still going strong. I am Italian American with a splash of Spaniard, originally from Brooklyn, New York (accent straight out of the Sopranos) I really would like to finally meet someone special!I am a caffeine head, so any coffee joint will be a nice start.I do not drink nor have I ever even tried any drugs, however I do not care if you drink.I am somewhat of a comedian and looking forward to hanging with a nice, caring woman again, hope they get my sense of humor. Hope we can chat soon.If you are curious about my music you can *** about *** think the greatest ice breaker, would be inviting them to see me perform at one of the very nice venues I appear at, on a regular basis
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DerekOffline
Man. 31 years old. Zodiac sign: Leo.
Looking for: woman. In age: 18-33
Hi! My name is Derek. I am never married catholic caucasian man without kids from Pembroke Pines, Florida, United States. Now I'm looking for new relationships. I want to meet a woman, love of my life.