Total users: 60,485,003 Online users: 217,747
Randal, 37
United States, West Virginia, West Hamlin

Online

About Me

None of you is even real. You're all just egirls with your www's and your webcams and those handy ordering pages. Girl, you even got a basket on that thing. I know cause I filled it up! But did I get a single pic of you on your "Meet super horny girls just like me," httpenis trap? Did I get an im after I talked to you and allowed to remote desktop into my computer to upload those pictures? Finally? No! I got an empty wallet, 3 overdrawn visas, and a looping gif of what looks like an Al Queda snuff porn starring a an alien midget that I can't remove for the life of me.Did I see you? No! You were fake. Obviously a cleverly created a Googlebot or something. But with boobs.So all y'all women are just fake Googlebots waiting to E-stroy my manhood and starve my eyeballs of nudity (except for midget nudity, apparently). I also will love you and shower you with joy forever and forever, delivering you an ocean of your best organisms. But let's take it slow.*****************************Ladies, if you think all men are fake, pretend, dolls that are scheming to raid your vaginas before they vanish into the night like ninja, you might want to consider how that comes across to us perusing guys. It reads like this to me, 'I am going to blame anybody but myself for being single. It's the mens' fault and I have simply been taken advantage of and I trusted too soon. I see myself as powerless against this occurring.'So unattractive. Please, think of the perusers.*this message brought to you by the Plenty of Fish Against Fakerists. POFAF, not even once (tm) First is the "Stick Test" where I poke you with one to ensure you aren't a clever illusion and, therefore, hopefully real. Then follow that up with some nice conversation to determine and measure the timbre of your voice and that it isn't too manish. Fool me once shame on me, right?Then, after drinks with my parents, the checking of the identification can begin and we can wind up the night by finally fornicating in my backyard hammock. OMG. So rad.Don't forget, REALITY is the best ITY. Jesus said that, you know, and he was right.

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Yes

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Other

  • Body type

    Athletic

  • Height

    6'3"

  • Eye color

    Brown

  • Smoke

    Yes, regularly

  • Drink

    Yes, regularly

INTERESTS

Action Fantasy History Western
Wink Icon color PERSONAL INFORMATION Fave
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SIMILAR PEOPLE

Great
stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
  • Swagfag from West Hamlin | Man | 30 years old | Pisces
    Swagfag

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    Man. 30 years old. Zodiac sign: Pisces.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 18-25

    I think the first thing you will notice about me is I have a big heart and I crack corny jokes all the time. I'm usually pretty laid back and calm, but I can be hyper and goofy from time to time as well. I listen to all types of music, I don't judge people by their style or music taste or anything. I'm 5'9", and I live at the gym. I'm not sure what else to say here, you can ask me anything :) iMessage: *** Text app(I'm on my ipad): ***

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  • Aurelio from West Hamlin | Man | 39 years old | Capricorn
    Aurelio

    Online

    Man. 39 years old. Zodiac sign: Capricorn.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 36-46

    Looking for a woman who is kind, gentle and believes relationships need work. Must take care of yourself and NOT do drugs or medication. I am a kind open minded person who is good spirited. I am well grounded and always look at the positive. (Always). I have found peace in my life throughout all the tough and negative it has thrown at me. Please be truthful and open. Please do not lie about your age,pics,interests or anything else, I will not tolerate it. I have not listed a list on here because each person is different and I like to talk and learn about people. If we are not a match I will kindly inform you so. Please be a adult about it and if you feel the same way then once again be a adult and just say we are not a match. Be kind to on another.If you weigh more than me, we will not be a match. **PRIVACY NOTICE**Warning--any person and/or *** this website or any of its associated websites, you do NOT have my permission to utilize any of my profile information nor any of the content contained herein including but not limited to my photos. You are hereby notified that you are strictly prohibited from disclosing, copying, distributing, disseminating, or taking any other action with regard to this profile and the contents herein. The foregoing prohibitions also apply to your employee(s), agent(student(s) or any personnel under your direction or control. The contents of this profile are private and legally privileged and confidential information, violation of my personal privacy is punishable by law. It is recommended that other members post a similar notice to this or you may copy and paste this one. Talk,smile,laugh and enjoy. If you want to talk and you feel women shouldn't start the conversation than just favorite me.

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  • Jovanni from West Hamlin | Man | 37 years old | Libra
    Jovanni

    Online

    Man. 37 years old. Zodiac sign: Libra.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 34-44

    I\'m sweet, pretty, & smart. My relationship with God is awesome. If I break it, let me fix it. I need a partner I can take care of and who can take care of me, together we will help each other.

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