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Jason, 39
United States, Pennsylvania, Center Valley

Online

About Me

Let it be known that I loathe laughter. It makes me SO ANGRY! When someone is having a good laugh I just *** compelled to PUNCH them in throat and then kick them in the JUNK. This makes me smile and giggle...which only pisses ME off and then I have to punch MYSELF in the throat and kick myself in the junk. Then no one is happy, and that is good, and when I say good I mean BAD.I despise travelling. My idea of a good vacation is drawing a chalk circle around myself, and NEVER leaving it. I just stand there and GLARE at everyone passing by.Kids? What the heck is up with THOSE? Don't people know where they come from? Seriously....it's like eeewwwww, please wash your hands after touching them. I sure don't have a couple of them myself! If I was a Jedi I would be called DARTH SANE, because I would be that INsane. Yeah, you had better stay away!!! Which MEANS that no, you can't use me as your personnel loofah! Seriously, what is THE matter with YOU! I think people aren't so bad. You just need to know how to cook them, the right spices and herbs and they are delicious. Vegetables???? Don't y'all know that is a big conspiracy to trick you to eat less people? One needs their daily dose of GRIT. Pets are good to have around when u RUN out of people...I am SO LAZY that it causes physical pain, which i love. And when i say love I mean hate, but i love that also. I don't do stairs, I either roll down them, or wait for some foolish Good Samaritan to CARRY me up them. Sometimes I wait a long time cause I am dirty. Showers and teeth brushing is unsafe, cause if you are clean you will taste better and other people will want to eat you. And that is bad, and when I say bad I mean GOOD....no wait, that one IS really bad. So when is say BAD I do mean BAD. Got it? Good.Let me get this straight girlfriend, you want me to hold you IN my arms and kiss you on the lips? Oh geez...seriously? Are you TRYING to repulse me and make me feel ill? I would much rather do something that I don't HATE, and by hate I mean LOVE.Even death doesn't want to be MY friend. Which I am okay with because he is actually a tall, skinny, pretentious snob. He is always like " I am here to take your soul" and I am all like " Can't you ever talk about ANYTHING else? Just shut up already!". Like really....Finally, one of the best parts of being evil is that I can end a ranting monologue with abundant evil laughter....ready? Here goes....MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA......MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA.....MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA Ha ha ha ha ha ...... I will take you somewhere so we can use our eyes for glaring, our fists for punching, and our feet for kicking. Yeah, you know you want to!

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Separated

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    No

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    6'1"

  • Eye color

    Brown

  • Smoke

    No

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

Bluegrass Country Funk Mystery Romance
Wink Icon color PERSONAL INFORMATION Fave
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SIMILAR PEOPLE

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stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
  • Williyz from Center Valley | Man | 57 years old | Libra
    Williyz

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    Man. 57 years old. Zodiac sign: Libra.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 39-59

    Hi! My name is Williyz. I am separated other caucasian man with kids from Center Valley, Pennsylvania, United States. Now I'm looking for new relationships. I want to meet a woman, love of my life.

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  • Ulrick from Center Valley | Man | 38 years old | Capricorn
    Ulrick

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    Man. 38 years old. Zodiac sign: Capricorn.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 35-45

    First off, Thank-you for dropping by my profile and (hopefully) reading through it!Second off, this is my third (or fourth) go-around on this site - I really hope to make this time my last time, but what the hell, its free.Did you have a good day? Its a polite thing to ask, and if we get to know each other, you can expect to hear that sort of thing from me regularly. Plus I give a great hug and appreciate a good cuddle. Its true, I am a cuddle monster.... just sayin' :)I do believe in God and feel its important and also think it helps to keep me grounded. I'd prefer to meet someone who has a similar belief system, or who can at least appreciate it.Here's 10 reasons you may want to message me and get to know me a little better:1) I want to get to know you, yes YOU! I'd like to start slowly, with an eye for the long-term2) I am baggage-free, except for the ones I use to travel3) I don't have a 'type' I'm attracted to - if you are in great physical shape, or have a few extra pounds, or have a lot of extra pounds, it doesn't matter. I don't have any photos of myself doing the Grouse Grind, so its ok if you don't either. I think curves are tremendous ;***I am honest and trustworthy - traits I find to be in short supply these days5) I like to '"spoon" and can be either the big or the little spoon with equal effect (I do prefer being little spoon though - who doesn't?***I really, really hate the terms 'bucket list' and 'partners in crime' . Completely and utterly over-used terminology! Insert originality here, please!7) I need a travel partner - any takers?8) I have a stable living situation and a solid job - hope you do too9) I know the difference between a woman and a Lady, and am looking for the latter***I am ridiculously eager to get off this site and never return! How about you?There are at least a few more reasons you should get to know me better - they are awesome! I'll let you discover them for yourself ! ;) Coffee works

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  • Geraldo from Center Valley | Man | 36 years old | Gemini
    Geraldo

    Online

    Man. 36 years old. Zodiac sign: Gemini.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 33-43

    Hi there. Thanks for taking the time to read my dating bio! I'm a business professional who is new to the area and looking for some great people to help me navigate this interesting little town. Ultimately, it would be great to form a friendship and evolve from there. My list of passions are long but family, business, music, travel and sports are just a few. I guess Vegas is out of the question huh?!

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