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Philip, 38

Offline, last seen Sun, 21 Jun 2026 02:09:36

About Me

I refuse to lay down lines of descriptive brevity, I cannot be summed up, contained, boxed out in ***characters. Nor can you. Why settle for tenacious texts, shopped selfies, the push to publish your profile. Your best face forward...I can promise, however, letters of absurdity, excessive alliteration, purple patches and dulcet indulgence. Maybe a shot of my six pack in the bathroom mirror. Now we're getting to know one another. Connection verified and broadbanded about.Until we meet, these ships pass through the night unnoticed, the plenty of fish below be damned, trolling with rod unreal.But these are modern times. And I digress...It is so nice to meet you.Let's not do this here, anywhere but here, I'll swim an ocean if it will save me another quick message, pixelled roses pending. This is the digital dancefloor, nothing but make-up and borrowed moves. And so we tango...under monitor's singular glow, hoping to one day look you in the eye. Interface. And such.

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Other

  • Body type

    Athletic

  • Height

    5'10"

  • Eye color

    Blue

  • Smoke

    No

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

SIMILAR PEOPLE

Great
stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
  • Elweard

    Offline

    Man. 39 years old. Zodiac sign: Leo.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 36-46

    I am more than willing to tell you anything and everything you want to know about me. Once you have approved me through the photo process. Lol. Even though this is a short message. I should warn you. I talk lots!! :). Talk with you soon. Let's talk first. I am not that easy!!

  • Jason

    Offline

    Man. 39 years old. Zodiac sign: Aquarius.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 36-46

    Let it be known that I loathe laughter. It makes me SO ANGRY! When someone is having a good laugh I just *** compelled to PUNCH them in throat and then kick them in the JUNK. This makes me smile and giggle...which only pisses ME off and then I have to punch MYSELF in the throat and kick myself in the junk. Then no one is happy, and that is good, and when I say good I mean BAD.I despise travelling. My idea of a good vacation is drawing a chalk circle around myself, and NEVER leaving it. I just stand there and GLARE at everyone passing by.Kids? What the heck is up with THOSE? Don't people know where they come from? Seriously....it's like eeewwwww, please wash your hands after touching them. I sure don't have a couple of them myself! If I was a Jedi I would be called DARTH SANE, because I would be that INsane. Yeah, you had better stay away!!! Which MEANS that no, you can't use me as your personnel loofah! Seriously, what is THE matter with YOU! I think people aren't so bad. You just need to know how to cook them, the right spices and herbs and they are delicious. Vegetables???? Don't y'all know that is a big conspiracy to trick you to eat less people? One needs their daily dose of GRIT. Pets are good to have around when u RUN out of people...I am SO LAZY that it causes physical pain, which i love. And when i say love I mean hate, but i love that also. I don't do stairs, I either roll down them, or wait for some foolish Good Samaritan to CARRY me up them. Sometimes I wait a long time cause I am dirty. Showers and teeth brushing is unsafe, cause if you are clean you will taste better and other people will want to eat you. And that is bad, and when I say bad I mean GOOD....no wait, that one IS really bad. So when is say BAD I do mean BAD. Got it? Good.Let me get this straight girlfriend, you want me to hold you IN my arms and kiss you on the lips? Oh geez...seriously? Are you TRYING to repulse me and make me feel ill? I would much rather do something that I don't HATE, and by hate I mean LOVE.Even death doesn't want to be MY friend. Which I am okay with because he is actually a tall, skinny, pretentious snob. He is always like " I am here to take your soul" and I am all like " Can't you ever talk about ANYTHING else? Just shut up already!". Like really....Finally, one of the best parts of being evil is that I can end a ranting monologue with abundant evil laughter....ready? Here goes....MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA......MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA.....MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA Ha ha ha ha ha ...... I will take you somewhere so we can use our eyes for glaring, our fists for punching, and our feet for kicking. Yeah, you know you want to!

  • Raynard

    Offline

    Man. 36 years old. Zodiac sign: Virgo.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 33-43

    God is numberv one in my life! Tattoo artist I went to culinary school so I know how to cook the way i look at it knowledge is one thing no one can take from you, so i learned to do many things to better my chances at succes . ..work out every day.. ..

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