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Ebenezer, 30
United States, Georgia, Fairmount

Online

About Me

Im corny like the jon after Thanksgiving. Oh and I'm gross like 144. I'm VERY picky. Especially in the morning when the fans been on all night and the air is really dry. If your profile says, "look no further!" Thank you. I'm nearsighted. I admire free thinkers. I pay a penny for my thoughts but I'm broke. Oh and if i dont get back to you right away, call me doc and you be patient. I get soooooo many messages! Dont you hate when people look at you like youre a piece of meat? I mean Im a person. I have feelings! Cant you just taste the sarcasm oozing off my page? Disclaimer: if i ask you what you like to do, pleeeeeaaaase dont say "i like to laugh!" Who doesn't like to laugh? Who says, "Laugh? **** that! i like to be miserable" Pardon my ebonics. Yea I wear white pants after Labor Day. Big whoop wanna fight aboudit??? And yea, I wear white pants. Again big whoop wanna fight aboudit???..Quick recap because as far as long profiles go, unlike my credit card, i carry a very low rate of interest. Why i'm here? I work a lot so there's not much time to meet anyone and when I do go out, I see the same people over and over! Thats a liiiieeeeeee. Truth is, i have about as much game as a rain delay. The last time I got a piece of ass, my finger slipped through the toilet papaer. I have a unique personality. I speak what's on my mind and usually it's something strange and unusual. (see the first 2 sentences) If I could sell tickets to my brain I wouldn't have to work again! If you're in the club every night, get a job. I like to go out but it's not my life. I'm a drinker but no alcoholic. I will say my phone needs a breathalyzer. I'm somewhat of a homebody. I'm not looking for anything. I learned that you find what you're looking for when you stop looking. I can't guarantee I know what I want but what I can guarantee is that ill know when I found it. Honestly, do you wanna know what I want?;when did you know?" The one thing I don't want is a pen pal. This is a dating site. If you just wanna talk, go on ***, Lets have some Good convo to start and lets take it from there. And by good convo, i dont mean answering all my questions with one word answers. Thats rude. Also, if I ask you what brings you on here, don't say a friend made it for you, thats hogwash. Also, if you're on this thing everyday, you're not on here "for laughs" or "for entertainment" You can tell how long a girl has been on this by the amount of skin they're showing. If they're in a turtleneck, they're new to the site. If they're doing the "Over the shoulder, wearing a bikini, cleavage shot" the they've been at this for a while and are pulling out all the stops. I'll make you a deal. Be real with me and ill be real with you! I don't bite. :-) Or uhhh a little clevage will have the same effect...so uhhh yea, pick your poison. Oh and if I message you multiple times, get off your high horse. I have a bad memory X-P. leave me alone on twitter #pissoff If you managed to read this far, I must warn you...I'm a cereal killer...in fact, there's a good chance I'm hiding in your closet stroking a knife! I'm kidding, my weapon of choice is a spoon. Oh one more thing, guys are dumb. If you're here for "casual dating/no commitment" we think you think like us and you're here for a booty call. Just wanna help ya out. Remember, we're all in this pond together.... And I just peed in it. Swim away from the warm spots!!! Isn't it ironic that I said I didn't like long profiles in a profile that's for all intents and purposes, long? Biggest pet peeve: if you judge someone before you get to know them, see my twitter. If you think you're better then me, chances are you're not. I own my own home which will be paid off in 5 years. Have a career and a good head. I don't have "swag" I have personality and ill take that all day. Alrighty then. I'm done...finally! *sigh* I lied, that was my second biggest pet peeve. My first is being a flake, If you're a flake, piss off 10 time over! Third biggest pet peeve? One ply toilet paper! Ok I'm out babay! Enjoy the show? Message me for an encore. Lets Gangnam Style! Update: I wrote this when Gangnam Style was popular. Still...lets Gangnam Style!

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Spiritual but not religious

  • Body type

    Athletic

  • Height

    5'8"

  • Eye color

    Brown

  • Smoke

    No

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

Drag Racing Shooting Sports Outdoor Hobbies
Wink Icon color PERSONAL INFORMATION Fave
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SIMILAR PEOPLE

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stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
  • Nevin from Fairmount | Man | 27 years old | Cancer
    Nevin

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    Man. 27 years old. Zodiac sign: Cancer.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 24-34

    Hi im Chris, im 27 and i live in central NJ. I work at a salvage yard stripping cars and also deliver parts. I am a very easy guy to get along with. My friends mean a lot to me. Also i like most kinds of music, i always have my ipod on. I am always willing to go out, very rarely do i just sit at home all night. Bowling is one of my favorite hobbies/sports, followed by mini golf which is a close 2nd. I also like to shoot pool, even though im not too good at it. I like to laugh and have a good time, plus i do talk a lot. I do occasionally drink, so once in a while its nice to go to a bar or even a club. however, im not big into clubs so its very rare that I go. I have lived my biggest goal. In the past year i have lost ***pounds. It was the hardest thing I have ever done but has been so rewarding. Its amazing what hard work and determination can do. I still like to go and workout oftenI want to meet a girl with a good personality and that likes to laugh. I want a deep meaningful connection and I hope to find it for a first date i would want to go get coffee or even go out to dinner. that way we could get to know eachother

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  • Kohath from Fairmount | Man | 28 years old | Cancer
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    Man. 28 years old. Zodiac sign: Cancer.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 25-35

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  • Wilson from Fairmount | Man | 29 years old | Virgo
    Wilson

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    Man. 29 years old. Zodiac sign: Virgo.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 26-36

    I'm 28 and an LSU graduate. Ideally, I'm into women who are witty, down-to-earth, appreciates good humor, passionate about the arts, young at heart, and has an overall unique personality. I don't have any specific "type" and I usually get along pretty well with different sorts of people. As far as hobbies, I'm usually down for whatever. I really enjoy playing music when I have friends available to jam with. I love videogames, board games, chess, pool, bowling, casino games, creating mixed drinks, making fun of bad movies, taking road trips, antiques, vintage stores, and such. Coffee or drinks at the bar.

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