Nirvana, 36
Online
About Me
Yeah I know, you're thinking why is this girl single?! Because I'm picky, I know what I want and I refuse to settle. I'm an adventurous outdoorsy girl with tons of personality, looking for the same. Well except for the girl part, trust me if I could date me I totally would ;-) Here's the problem, everyone claims to be outdoorsy but they're really just couch potato video gamers and that's just not my cup of tea! Don't get me wrong I love snuggling on the couch and watching a movie or better yet watching the game, but when the couch has a permanent indent of ... oh I dont know maybe....YOU! Then we have an issue. Here are some things I'm looking for:OutdoorsyPersonalityGoalsAttractionIntelligenceFunnyManlyEducatedYou don't have to be Bear Gryllis, in fact I'd prefer that you weren't cause I'm definitely not going to kiss you if you drink your own urine just for TV ratings. Seriously there were plenty of other viable sources of hydration in that episode. But it would be nice if you had a genuine appreciation for the great outdoors.I don't expect you to have your doctorate (those guys usually lack personality anyways) but a pretty good grasp on the English language would be ideal. Bonus if you know the difference between their, there and they're.And I don't need you to be Wil Ferrel, but if you can at least keep up with me that would be great! Some major turnoffs include:PRETENDING YOU HAVE YOUR ACT TOGETHER- Yes, there is a reason it's in all caps! Honesty is the best policy, eventually the other person is going to find out you're a fraud. Trying to start a relationship on a lie is just plain stupid! I work hard for my money and I live comfortably. I am not your sugar momma and I don't expect to pick up the check every time we go out to dinner. If your ass is broke, don't even waste my time. Definition of broke- Does not have play money, can not go on vacation, etc... Do not interpret that as me being a gold digger as most women are. I am not. I make my own money and I am looking for an equal. Not looking for someone to support me. I've been on my own for 18 years, have paid my way and have owned my own house since I was 23. And yes I did just date one of the aforementioned frauds. Not only was he broke, but full of drama. On that note.....Drama- I know I know, all women say they hate drama but secretly they thrive on it. First of all 99% of women are a little more than a degree of crazy. I have zero tolerance for drama. Whether it be work drama, baby mama drama, ex girlfriend, ex wife, family drama, friend drama. Don't care! If drama rears it's ugly head, I will kick your dramatic ass to the curb so fast your head will spin. Creepy facial hair- nicely trimmed goatee, 5 oclock shadow awesome... Duck Dynasty.... Absolutely not! Do I think they're funny? Yes! Can I picture them naked? Not a chance! Lets not forgot the pornstache made famous by firefighters and Tom Selleck in the 80's, lets leave it there shall we?Not reading my profile- Especially if we have absolutely nothing in common! Even worse profile stalkers. Get your own material!Skinny Jeans... Do I even have to elaborate?Metros- If you have a Manpurse, or any other type of fanny pack, It's quite possible we're not batting for the same team.- They remind me of that part in a horror movie where the killer says he wants you to watch. Queue the deliverance banjos. Self pics- you know those pictures you take in a mirror with your camera, the deer in headlights look that usually take place at planet fitness, in your bathroom, or even worse the planet fitness bathroom. FYI if you're gonna take those pics make sure your toilet is clean in the background. Epic photo fail! Yep they're on here!- Or even worse you really are that young and look 20 years older. Worse yet you're 20 years older than me and sending winks. That's creepy! I'm a very young 35 and I don't have daddy issues.Lying about your height- I'm 5' 3". If I'm wearing 2" heels.... Do the math... That's 5'5" if I'm towering over you, that's not 5'9" Can you even reach the pedals in your lifted Monster Truck?Kids- If you have one kid great, 2 that's fine, 3 I'm out! Also, If you have multiple baby mamas that's a deal breaker!One night stands- I'm not on here for random hook ups. I realize meetville is famous for that but that's what Section 8 girls are for. Living in your parents basement, attic, garage or any other unused portion of space that belongs to them and is specifically referenced in their deed. Note, living in your brother or sister's house is the same as living in your parents house, you're still mooching off someone else.Incarcerated- Yes apparently I needed to revise my list of turn offs. It turns out meetville will let anyone on here. Really?! Clearly if you're in jail not only are you not outdoorsy but you've likely violated all of the above disclaimers. Disclaimers aside.... if you're looking for a fun girl that loves the outdoors and will make you laugh then shoot me a message. First date- just drinks and conversation, second date- definitely a baseball, football or hockey game or something outdoorsy.
PERSONAL INFORMATION
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Looking for
man
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Relationship
Never married
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Have kids
No
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Wants kids
Someday
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Ethnicity
Caucasian
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Faith
Christian
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Body type
Average
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Height
5'3"
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Eye color
Blue
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Smoke
No
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Drink
Yes, socially
INTERESTS
on 377 reviews
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