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Yolande, 31
United States, New Jersey, Mays Landing

Online

About Me

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class.One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. 'JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep.Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR a***!"The Teacher fainted.

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    man

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    5'1"

  • Eye color

    Brown

  • Smoke

    Yes, regularly

  • Drink

    No

INTERESTS

Adult Comedy Horror
Wink Icon color PERSONAL INFORMATION Fave
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    Hi! My name is Hannan. I am never married catholic caucasian woman without kids from Mays Landing, New Jersey, United States. Now I'm looking for new relationships. I want to meet a man, love of my life.

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    I am extremely adventurous, ambitious and surprisingly laidback. I love roughing it one weekend and the next weekend throwing on the heels and hitting the town. I'm a southernbelle that knows how to play the with the boys, but also loves throwing the perfect dinner party. I also have to admit that I have a soft side (shhh... don't tell anyone) that likes to cuddle on the couch, hold hands in the park, kiss off in the corner (or in the middle of a crowd should the moment arise!). I believe in making an impact. If you do something, enjoy it and do it well. Every couple of years, I make it a goal to learn a new sport. I've also picked up CrossFit and love it! Somethings you should know about me: My friends and family mean the world to me! I work hard, but I make sure I have time for those I loveI am not perfect and I don't look for perfection in others. I love being outdoors and have an active life. For me, communication and honesty are extremely important to me. In looking for a significant other, I would love someone that can challenge me, tease me, keep up with me, and be able to walk beside me. Update: Ok fellas , I'm not your sister or some distant friend. I honestly don't want to be your penpal. (and texting can also enter into penpal-land -- don't let it happen!) If you are too scared to meet for coffee or such after a exchanging a handful of ***, then you probably are barkin' up the wrong tree. I have patience... but not the patience of a SAINT!!! If we don't hit it off... It is OK... it's not the end of the world. I promise! Keep it simple!

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