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Yolande, 31
United States, New Jersey, Mays Landing

Offline, last seen Mon, 06 Apr 2026 22:06:50

About Me

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class.One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. 'JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep.Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR a***!"The Teacher fainted.

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    man

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    5'1"

  • Eye color

    Brown

  • Smoke

    Yes, regularly

  • Drink

    No

INTERESTS

Adult Comedy Horror
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SIMILAR PEOPLE

Great
stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
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    Evelynn

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    Woman. 31 years old. Zodiac sign: Scorpio.

    Looking for: man. In age: 28-38

    I love being outdoors, and enjoy doing anything that involves this! I love to travel and would like to do much more before I settle down! I'm ready for the next chapter in my life, and I'm not interested in games or dating without purpose. I am extremely successful an although this may be a turn on for you, I've found that my success has often been referred to as intimidating. So if having an independent self sufficient woman isn't what you are looking for then move along. I am happy with what I have achieved and continue to be overly ambitious.I am independent, creative, and Adventurous!I have learned I like a man who has confidence, humor, and charm :) Any man who can truly make me laugh, please respond! I'm up for anything! Be spontaneous!

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    Bari

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    Woman. 31 years old. Zodiac sign: Aries.

    Looking for: man. In age: 28-38

    Its always hard to write about yourself. I am definently more of a country person that a city person. Love being outdoors doing anything. My two favorite sports are hockey and Nascar. They are great to watch on TV, but would much rather go in person. Nothing better than going to see live music. I listen mostly to metal and then a little country. I guess anything else just ask.

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    Sheryll

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    Woman. 34 years old. Zodiac sign: Pisces.

    Looking for: man. In age: 31-41

    i'm a die-hard Leaf fan, who loves her family, friends and most of all Jesus. i am undefeated at Lord of the Rings Trivial Pursuit, addicted to peanut butter cups, and couldn't function in a world without Post-It notes. i firmly believe that the previews are the best part of going to the movies. i love being outdoors, exploring used bookstores, country music, and fireworks. i think that nothing is sexier than compassion, and am looking for a guy who knows that Love wins. :)

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