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Kelvin, 50
United States, Maryland, Arnold

Offline, last seen Fri, 24 Oct 2025 02:22:59

About Me

Ok, who's ever completed this bit in under 20 minutes? If so, give yourself a crackerjack pencil (shows how old you really are if you remembered)& can't think what to say?Ok, here's a starter for 10. I make cakes for a living! (stampede of women's feet then suddenly screeching to a halt when they think they're gonna get fat! but please don't let that put you off cos I promise I won't steal your car!Music: Anything on the radio 1 playlist is out of the question, I have some taste, though varied. &Filums: A good comedy, A good thriller, generally any good film???Going out: Rarely, but if I do, I can usually be found at The Bull outside sat on me own like a slog (Sad Lonely Old Git) I'm a bit old fashioned I'm afraid & think jeans & trainers on a man going out for the night is a no no, so I only ever wear trousers, shirt & shoes. Would much prefer cuddled up on the sofa, at least then I wouldn't have to wait for all the women to get out of the mens toilets, why do you do that? You all complain about the other women taking too long & when you get in there you do the same thing?? (sorry, I had to get that off my chest) Oh, & another thing, you know you shouldn't be going out anymore when you hear yourself say "does the music really have to be that loud?"Hobbies: Amongst other things, collecting dust has been a favoured past time of late. Destroying a good classic on my guitars, if Carlsberg made guitarists, it wouldn't be me! I'm very keen on gardening, I could watch someone do it all day :0)TV: Classic comedy & newer comedies.; anything with Karl Pilkington in it :0)Dislikes: Liars, Un-Reliable people, those from strange villages that still point at airplanes & sprouts (The Devils testicles)Home is with my 25 year old son & his girlfriend. Now I know how my mum & dad felt!How would my friends describe me seems to be a popular quote on here, so here goes, Dave? he's honest, too honest for his own good, a right miserable boring old fart who goes on & on & on about how fed up he is & we wish he wouldn't come round! a favourite quote of theirs I believe is " turn the lights off, he'll think we're out" Yes, I've turned into me dad! (told you I was too honest for my own good!)I wear my heart on my sleeve & don't pretend I don't but it has been battered a bit lately, battered as in ripped to bits, not the sort you put on cod :0)I'm at that age now where I go in the kitchen, stand there, look around, wonder what it was I went in for then sit back on the sofa & then remember what I went in the kitchen for!Also noticed that I'll go to a kitchen cupboard for a nibble, see there's no crisps left in the bag of 24 I bought 2 days ago (I hate people leaving empty stuff in cupboards/fridge too, they're called "off spring"), then sit back down & 20 minutes later, go & look to see if there's anything that's miraculously appeared by magic since I last looked. Is it just me or do others do that?My ideal woman?? Smiling eyes are important, I'm an eye person, the rest will follow. I love a woman to be funny, loving (don't mean sex wise) warm & understanding. At our age none of us has got to what we perceive as this very long cul-de-sac without some hurt or pain in our lives, it makes us who we are! I'm a very good listener & I doubt you've been through much in life that I haven't. So I do have lots of empathy care to give.Nothing makes me happier than just lay on the sofa cuddled up or holding hands & just being contented, sometimes comfortable silence & a hug can mean more than a thousand words.So, there you have it, I'm sure I've accumulated a bit more info over the last 50 years but that'll do for now.I Don't get on here too often due to odd working, so if anyone (he says hopefully) messages me, I'm not being *** joke for you, a man walks into a doctors & says "doctor, I think I'm a moth" the doctor says, "I'm a GP, I think you need to see a psychiatrist" the man says "I know but I saw your light was on" (ok, it wasn't that bad!)P.S. What the hell is an "Activity Partner" If it means you can teach me how to play the guitar properly, I'm in!! Somewhere busy so you can pretend you haven't seen me & do a runner! I'm me & don't pretend to be someone I'm not & I'd like a first meet to be with someone who's brought themselves & not their representative persona, if you know what I mean?

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Separated

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Spiritual but not religious

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    6'0"

  • Eye color

    Blue

  • Smoke

    Yes, socially

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

American Football
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