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Mabel, 24
United States, Rhode Island, Cranston

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About Me

~just now I am figuring out who I am.~i have a hard time with the concept of forgiving .~i smile all the time because I don't know what else to do .~sumetimes i just want u to listen, not talk, not interrupt, not offer advice or suggestions. sumetimes all i want is u to sit there and listen and to feel like i have been heard.~there are so many things i wish i could say.~i cry when u hug me because of the emptiness and pain i know i'll feel when u finally do let me go .~i really do care about you, more than u could even imagine.~im afraid to know myself and understand my feelings and wishes.~as im smiling and laughing, I have voices screaming and degrading me in my head.~my family is more dysfunctional than i like to admit.~im always in a state of obsession.my mind is always going a mile a minute,i never have a moment of pure peace or silence in my head.~id love to escape to somewhere by the beach, eat, drink, dance, without a care in the world.~some days I feel like the old me & it feels so liberating .~i feel nothing most of the time and i wait to see your reactions before I know how to respond/reply/react myself.~i hate, absolutely hate, feeling vulnerable and i will do almost anything to avoid it.~i worship the ground my big sister walks on and she doesn't even know it. I compare myself to everything she does.~Sometimes i feel like i dont belong anywhere and i feel like an alien,and that i dont belong in this time because my outlook feels so foreign.~i still sleep with a stuffed animal.~i hate being needy and yet i long to be taken care of.~i simultaneously crave both fitting in and standing out.i feel like a failure when i'm different, and i feel like a failure when I blend.~i will not show that im mad at you. In fact, i probably won't even feel mad at you, unless someone else reassures me that it IS something to be mad about.~im scared shitless because i dont know what to do with my life and i cant cope without direction .~i nly pretend to be immature:im scared to show you just how serious and deep i can be. dinner and a few drinks maybe grab a movie..I'm open to suggestions :)

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    man

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Yes

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Spiritual but not religious

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    5'1"

  • Eye color

    Blue

  • Smoke

    Yes, regularly

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

Electronic English Portuguese Turkish Motorcycle Racing
Wink Icon color PERSONAL INFORMATION Fave
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