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Kelli, 29

Online

About Me

This is the last time I'm trying thishi im awesome and wonderful. i like everything and love all music. im normal and sweet and have never been cheated on multiple times and everything i just wrote was sarcastic....Click here to download boyfriend applicationPS... I have player radarIn an article I read today : An online profile, 'is like reading the ingredients on a box of food and trying to imagine what it would taste like' Meaning... I wont know if I like you until I meet u.There has to be a guy thats somewhere between 'i love you on the second date' and 'i dont like the word girlfriend' 'its not that love is overrated, its that we overrated the ones we loved' i like workin out, goin out, stayin in, wine, and sushi...? Sums it up well :)Extra points if you know how to talk on the phone. Having any luck on here???...yes thanks I am..ummm....im still here!!!! So no. ******************Good time to pause and take a shot...SoCo and Lime?....ok ready go********************For my next act... i will magically turn on my automatic messaging filter by stating the following...- Having girls in your all pics does not make you more appealing. less actually. there is this new cropping feature that scientists invented last week.-EXs...if you still talk to them, talk about them, they blow up your phone, or they're still all over your *** out. An ex is an ex for a reason and if you can't get rid of them while you're single then you're gonna have a bigger problem when you try to date someone.- Just because you keep messaging me and changing the subject line to start with a RE: doesnt mean im gonna think i wrote back to you- must be able to spell your profession- must be able to hold your alcohol and also know when to stop drinking. im not into babysitting anymore. - If you have to ask what the first phrase in my profile means then we wont work out. same goes for your interpretation of my tone throughout the profile. im nice.- At this point, Ive basically given up on trying to date to find 'the one' im much more laid back about it now- Why why why would you still have your profile up and active if youre 'not single/not looking' and your desciption says how youve found the love of your life blah blah blah... does she know youre still hoppin around the net? i believe youre just fishing for compliments. Pun intended. Ha!- i have this thing about taking a guys profile seriously if it says anything OTHER than 'intent: looking for a relationship, actively looking for a relationship, or dating.' anything else i usually skim through and move on. am i really supposed to be intrigued by 'casual dating/no commitment'? - If your age ends in 'teen' im not sure why you would message me...on that same note... la la la... i dont date younger ever- I promise it's not that hard to not live with your mom- I can tell if your message came from ctrl c and ctrl v... huh? :)- If you 'only smoke when you drink' its probably not a good idea to answer 'no' to the smoking question- With a 0.***% exception rate, this is for all the boys who live far away from me and are just coming to KC for a minute and write me that youre 'just looking for some fun! hit me up!'...you might as well just say...'hey! im coming to your town and im not from there and im looking for someone to f*** since i'll never see you again after we hang out!'...my profile says long term... not weekend tour guide/f*** buddy... There's more!- Im not here to schedule massages for you, or as some of you say, 'messages' cracks me upExamples of things that probably wont win a girl over...- saying 'well youre not my type but we should go out sometime'- taking her swimming at your apt complex and then saying you cant go up to your apt with her cuz your girlfriend is home- taking her to a bar where you know your ex will be that night and leaving her chillin on the side of the dance floor while you go yell at your ex because she is dancing with a guy. - staring at the game on TV oblivious to the world around you on a first date and saying an average of 3 words an hour. duh.- 'I miss my ex wife'- 'I'm glad you could meet me tonight. I really had nothing better to do so i figured this'll work'- having a longer convo with the waitress than with the girl youre on a date with. another duh. i wish i could think of more but i think ive successfully blocked out most of the ridiculous experiences...This section is called the 'aw...how romantic' section of received messages...- yo boo lemme hit that- hi how are you...id like to lick your feetMinimum requirementslicense, car, job, no baby momma dramaso... in conclusion... hi. i would like a boyfriend. bye!

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    man

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Yes

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    5'2"

  • Eye color

    Green

  • Smoke

    No

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

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stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
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